I know for a lot of people using Social Media used to be a fun experience, but now it just feels stressful (even more so with some of the recent changes that are being made on some of the major platforms.) It has certainly lost that spark it used to have, it’s no longer about sharing the things you love and enjoy or connecting with others, it has become about how many likes, views or the number of followers you have, as well as aesthetics, and content value, etc, etc.
So in this post, you will not find a How-to guide on building engagement, No, consider this your anti-growth guide with a focus on cultivating a more joyful experience when using social media.
I, myself personally go through phases with social media like I’m sure most people do, there are times when I enjoy it and times when I don’t. These times result in feeling like my posts aren’t good enough, and questioning what I should and shouldn’t share, this can be because something I want to post doesn’t fit in with my feed aesthetic or if I haven’t shared something specific for a while or even because I want to share something completely new. Or I just don’t end up posting at all, potentially for months (or years lol) on end. Because of the stress I feel towards it, I end up feeling burnt out before I have even begun. There is also the fear of saying anything and feeling like it might be wrong, even if it wasn’t meant to be.
Even though I’m not posting on social media regularly at the moment I thought I would share some of the tips below that might be helpful to someone who might be feeling the same way. I am taking my time to get back into posting online, be it here on my blog or on social media, and taking time to evaluate what it is I want to do, and how I want to go about things in the future.
I’ve included something new in this post that I may bring more of into future content and that is Journaling Prompts. Journaling is something I have been trying to do more of recently. Though I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not one of those people who journals every day, though I would like to be. However, I have found it helpful and thought that bringing something like this into my content might interest some people or at least be helpful to someone.
They are totally optional though, so if you’re not interested then just skip that part and continue reading the rest of the post.
Journaling Prompts – Write about how Social Media makes you feel.
Before getting started how about trying some journaling, focus on how you feel when you use Social Media. Think about things like; how you feel when you’re scrolling through your feed and how you think that impacts you or what you post. Here are some prompts below to help you out:
How does Social Media make you feel?
- How do you feel when you’re scrolling through social media? do feel anxious, excited, inspired?
- Does using social media make you feel anxious? If so, why do you think it makes you feel that way? If you feel something else describe what about it makes you feel that way?
- Are there things you would like to share but hesitate to because you are unsure or it doesn’t fit in with your feed? What do you think it is that’s stopping you from doing this?
- If there was something you could change about social media, what would that be? The way you use it? Or how often you use it? Or is there something else you would like to change?
Some of these questions might help you discover what it is about social media that causes you stress and help you make a potential plan to work on making those changes.
How To Make Social Media Work For You
1. Curate your feed.
This might feel daunting but spend 10-15 minutes going through and start auditing your ‘Following’ list*. Ask yourself whether these accounts fit with your current vibe. You may need to do this multiple times if necessary. (Make time once a week to reflect on this and use this as a gradual reset.)
Of course, we are going to get stuff in our feeds we didn’t ask for which unfortunately is a part of most social media platforms** these days and isn’t something we have total control over but auditing who you’re following may have a bigger impact on your feed than you realise.
*Alternatively if you have a private account and you stress about who’s following you or friends with you on a social media platform you can also audit this list as well. I know it’s hard but it’s your profile or account and if there is someone you no longer want following you, you have the right to choose to not have them following you anymore. For people with a public account you can block people from interacting with your account if necessary.
**This may be more prevalent and noticeable on some platforms and not on others. Like I’ve noticed on Instagram it’s much easier to curate the things I want to see but on Facebook, I get all sorts of stuff that I’m not interested in. (though this could change at any time.)
2. Follow new accounts to fit with the vibe you want to cultivate.
Like your following audit, this is something that can be done over time. Gradually you will find suggestions based on what you’re interacting with and this again will help you fill your feed with more positive vibes. Currently, I’m getting a lot of positive affirmations, bookish content, and dog videos and I’m totally here for it.
Use hashtags or explore pages on your social media apps like Instagram to find the content that you want to see more of in your feed. Check out some of the accounts that have posts or videos that resonate with you and audit whether you want to see more of their content in your feed. Also liking different posts will tell your algorithm what you want to see more of.
3. Forget about aesthetics and content value…
Forget about aesthetics, content value, likes, numbers, stats, etc, post whatever inspires you, don’t worry about whether it fits in with your feed or not. Not everyone is or wants to be a content creator or influencer. (If you’re lacking ideas on what to post try a photo challenge to boost your confidence.)
4. Take a Break
If you are feeling overwhelmed by the constant pressure that sometimes comes with sharing on social media, it’s okay to take a break and come back when you feel refreshed. No one is expecting anything from you, chances are you’re likely putting that pressure on yourself (I know I am.)
Taking a Break could look like a few different things, it could look like setting boundaries around using your social media accounts or taking longer periods away from your favourite Social Media apps.
Maybe you set boundaries around specific times or how long you will spend each day accessing them. Or maybe you feel the need to take a day or weekend off, or longer. Either way, setting boundaries can help reduce the anxiety or burnout that you might be feeling when using them.
Extra Tip:
If you have a smartphone that allows you to set ‘App Timers’* or create ‘Focus Modes’ these can be great to use to set boundaries around using your social media apps on your devices. They should be in your settings under Focus, Screen Time, Modes and Routines or Digital Wellbeing (app timers) something like that. I use these myself and find them super helpful in reducing my time on social media and other apps.
Also turning off notifications from these apps can be helpful because you aren’t constantly being bombarded with them every time there is an interaction and therefore are less likely to be checking them all the time.
*(Some social media apps do offer something similar but I prefer using these methods if possible because they grey out the app icon and limit accessing it at all. Yes, you could turn them off but I think it is a better visual indication that this app’s limit is up.)
6. Start over
If all this seems way too overwhelming, why not consider starting over. You can always create a new account and start from scratch.
If you are someone who is sharing for a business or creating content, maybe the answer could be creating a private account with which you have the option of following accounts that fit with your vibe, as well as having more control over who is following you, but also sharing your own posts without feeling the need to give in to all the numbers and aesthetics.
7. Delete or Disable
If Social Media is really having a negative effect on your mental health and none of the previous suggestions feel helpful to you, then maybe it’s time to consider ‘Is social media the place for me?’, ‘Do I need to be on there?’.
If Deleting your account feels too permanent, then maybe disabling your account is an option you might want to consider, in case you want to re-enable it one day when and if you feel ready to.
A lot of people are moving away from social media these days for various reasons, so if this is how you feel just know you are not alone and it will be okay.
Final Thoughts
This post feels more relevant now than ever, with recent changes being made to a few of the bigger platforms. These changes will possibly have some negative effects on what we are seeing pop up in our feeds. It may be easier to use some of the above strategies on some platforms over others and I do believe that we need to keep a balance with positive voices remaining on these social media platforms. But I also believe that you need to do what is good for your mental health and if that means removing yourself and finding somewhere else to cultivate a positive place for yourself and your community then by all means do that.
I hope that this post was helpful and I hope that you can all have a more positive experience when using social media.
I’ve recently decided for myself that I want to downsize my social media (have less accounts) part of that means that I have also decided to make my personal Instagram account (which has always been public since the early days of Instagram) private and potentially delete others to focus on using these accounts only. I felt that this was the best course of action for me as I am just generally feeling stressed out about posting on social media and there have been recent actions from big social media platforms that just make me feel uncomfortable, but I don’t feel ready to delete my accounts completely so I thought that having a private account was the best course of action for me for now.
I have one public account left on Instagram that I use for promo for this blog and I am still deciding If I want to keep it like that for that purpose or delete it and use my YouTube channel as promo for sharing what I’m posting. I also have a bookstagram account which I have since made private and that I am no longer posting on. I am planning to delete it sometime soon.
I wanted to share this post and my story to let you know that you are not alone and that it is okay to not want to give in to outside pressures that say we have to do things a certain way. You can do what you feel is best for you and use social media in a way that makes it a joyful experience for you or if you want to remove yourself then that is okay too.
Things to Remember
- Remember That: It’s okay to use social media in a way that suits you. You don’t have to stress over whether something fits your aesthetic or will it get likes. It’s okay to let go of that and do something different.
- Take time to Reflect: on how social media makes you feel? and how you can make the experience a more positive one?
- Think about: curating your follow feed to fit with the vibes you want to cultivate for yourself. If this also means unfollowing or muting some people you know that’s totally okay. This is your account and you have the right to have a positive experience.
Thank you for reading this post, I’m sending you all positive vibes and hoping that you can find peace and joy when using social media and the internet.
Erin.
Credits – +, ++: The logos and UI’s featured in this post belong to their respective copyright holders. Those being Meta, Google and Pinterest. I do not own the copyright to the UI or logos featured in this post. The logos, icons and UI featured in this post are used for educational purposes.
Disclaimer – This post is not sponsored and doesn’t contain any affiliate links, any links included are for reference only in case you are interested in checking out a mentioned link or purchasing a reviewed product. check out my full Disclaimers here including Ai use on my blog.
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