Life of Dahlia

In 2024 I decided to take a step back from my online hobbies, including this blog to focus more on myself. My goals were to better understand myself and how my brain works. Specifically how to work with my ASD and ADHD and try to find what works for me as a neuro-divergent person with chronic health conditions.

My goals consisted of finding what routines and tools could help with battling things like procrastination and overwhelm, as well as how to calm my racing and often anxious mind. But unfortunately, as I always do I ended up not allowing myself to take time to figure out what worked and what didn’t. I lumped too much on my plate, trying to do all the things at once instead of prioritizing one or two things to try out at a time. It definitely made me feel like I was failing to get where I wanted to be. But I can now see where I went wrong and in 2025 I have changed the way I want to look at my goals and while some of my goals are similar to my 2024 goals my approach has definitely changed.

This year I want to set more realistic expectations for myself and allow myself more kindness when things don’t exactly go to plan, because there will evidently be times when that will happen, so rather than make myself feel bad about it I will just adapt to suit whatever is going on at the time.

In this post I am going to share some of my personal goals that I have set myself for 2025, and my new mindset that I am using when setting and working on for those goals.

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My Word of the Year is – Alignment

Last year was the first year I started choosing a word or multiple words that I felt described my goals or mindset for the year, for 2025 my word of the year is ‘Alignment’.

The Cambridge Dictionary describes ‘Alignment’ as:

Alignment noun (POSITION)
‘an arrangement in which two or more things are positioned in a straight line or parallel to each other’.

Other words also used to describe alignment are balance and harmony. But when we talk about ‘Alignment’ in the context of ourselves it essentially means that we are making decisions or living our lives in a way that reflects our core beliefs and values. Which will hopefully give a sense of purpose and fulfilment.

I’ve chosen this as my word of the year because I want to learn more about what my values are and what kind of lifestyle I want to live and ‘Alignment’ seemed to be the perfect fit when describing my 2025 goals.

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What are my 2025 Goals? And How Am I Approaching Them?

At the end of 2024, I read ‘The Success Myth’ by Emma Gannon and I found it really helped me change my mindset on how to approach my goals and routines. It helped point out all the pressures that society has put on us and that we force ourselves to live up to. We push ourselves to fit into boxes without first checking in with ourselves and figuring out what is actually important to us. So much of it resonated with me and made me realise so much about myself and how much unrealistic pressure I put on myself. (Low key I was already aware of this but sometimes we just need a little reminder.)

As someone who is both neuro-divergent and lives with chronic health issues I have always felt like I had to keep up with everyone else and after reading ‘The Success Myth’ I have come realize that I don’t need to do that anymore. I don’t need to keep up and I don’t want to. What I need to do is figure out what is important to me and do things on my own timeline, not someone else’s. I don’t have to keep putting myself into a box anymore. What is important is to do things when it feels right for me or in a way that works for me.

Emma’s approach to goal setting was also helpful so rather than setting intentions I’m using a somewhat ‘Milestone’ and ‘Process’ goals method.
Your ‘Milestone’ goals are your overall goals (the big ones), while your ‘Process’ goals are the things you do to get there (they are the little details, the steps to get to your goal). ‘Process’ goals also allow and encourage you to enjoy the process of achieving the goal.
I’m not following any particular methods to a tee, I’m just focusing on what works for me and helps me find enjoyment when working on my goals, but I found this method quite helpful in how I should approach goal setting.

(I highly recommend reading ‘The Success Myth’ by Emma Gannon, it was my best read of 2024. It highlights so many things that we probably already know but it is like that friend you go to for advice and they tell you the things you know already but you really just needed someone else to point it out so that you can be reminded of how important it is to walk your own path in your own time. Definitely recommend putting it on your TBR.)

Focusing on what brings me Joy

Earlier this year I made the decision to do a massive declutter of all the stuff in my house and along with this I decided to read some of Marie Kondo’s books including ‘The life-changing magic of tidying up’, ‘Spark Joy’ and ‘Kurashi at Home’. Reading these books has hopefully had a life-changing effect on me. They really guided me through the process of decluttering my home and made me want to prioritize seeking out more joy in my life.

Marie’s ‘Kon Mari’ method and ‘Spark Joy’ philosophy have really helped me re-prioritize my life. Like ‘The Success Myth’ I feel like it’s given me the help that I needed to realise what I need to focus on. And in a world that is constantly changing (for better or worse) finding something small every day that brings me joy will hopefully help find something to ground me.

I want to make this a big priority because I have been through so many ups and downs in my life and I am in a constant battle with my body and mind, so it can be hard to see and remember those small moments of joy when I am used to living in such a negative space. This is why I want to prioritize finding and noticing joyful moments in my day even if they are really small.

I am doing this in a few different ways, firstly I like to end my day by trying to think of joyful or grateful moments from that day, but I also do some weekly and monthly check-ins to continue to help me realise that there are joyful moments even in the gloomy space I feel in sometimes, especially when my body isn’t feeling great and I feel like it is holding me back. But I also try to prioritize activities that bring me joy, like reading, doing something creative like colouring or drawing or watching a comfort movie to help bring those moments into my day purposefully.

Figuring out what my values are?

Values are something I have never thought much about until recently, but I feel like I am at a point in my life where I really want to clarify what is important to me, what my core values are and how do they fit into my life?

This is an area that I really want to explore through mindfulness and journaling practices. It’s not something that I feel like I can rush but it is something that I really need to take my time with and explore with curiosity.

I think asking ourselves questions like this is important, how do they fit with the person we want to be, how do they fit into our lifestyle and are there some things that we once valued or believed but now don’t, do we need to re-adjust some of our values to align with who we are now?

I’m excited to explore this more this year.

Mindfulness and Movement

There are a few goals from 2024 that I will be rolling over to this year but I am trying to approach them in a different way, this includes making sure that I am keeping mindfulness and movement in my routines as much as possible. I will be exploring various ways on how I can add these into my weekly routine and in a way that works with my energy levels and other health issues.

Movement

Movement in particular can sometimes be hard for me to implement in my routine regularly so I do what I can, when I can, which is different from my previous approach where I would try and set a regular schedule that just didn’t work. While it can be frustrating to not have the energy or because some other issues are stopping me from doing it, instead I am trying to add it in where I can and work with those restrictions instead of forcing myself to do something when my body doesn’t feel up to it.

Sometimes this can just be making sure that I’m not sitting for long periods of time and just getting up and going for a short walk, nothing too strenuous, but If there are times when I feel that I can do something more I might do a longer walk on the treadmill or maybe some yoga or dancing. I have also started using a standing desk set up occasionally when I am working on projects. whether that’s doing some writing or some art, by doing this it encourages me to move more often.

One of the other ways I am trying to encourage myself to move more is by doing some of The Conqueror Virtual Walking Challenges, I started purchasing some last year and have already completed four walking challenges including the London, Paris, Rome and Year one of the Harry Potter walking challenges.

I am currently working my way through the West Coast Trail, the Scotland 500 and the Conquer 2025 (in which I set my own goal of 400 km.) My average weekly kms or steps vary depending on how I am feeling physically. Some days I only get 500 steps and others I get between 3000-5000 steps, but it all helps keep me motivated and at the end I get a physical medal to celebrate my achievements.

Mindfulness

As for Mindfulness I am exploring different ways to bring it into my day. Sometimes I find sitting down to do some meditation hard, especially if I am feeling genuinely uncomfortable in my body. It just makes it hard to sit down to do it, so I am using various simple activities as a way for getting some brain breaks, like taking time when I am showering in the morning to just focus on the motions and the sounds and sensations of the water as a time to do some meditation instead of having to sit down a take time out to do it. Other things I’m doing are using simple activities like doing my washing and hanging it out or folding and putting it away. Washing dishes is also another good one.

I’ve also been exploring journaling which was something I just struggled to get into for years. I guess because I was feeling very down and anxious the idea of seeing my thoughts and feelings on a page was hard but in the last year or so I’ve really taken to it and I’m trying out different types of journaling from using prompts to just doing a general brain dump (which can be anything from thoughts, feelings or what I need to do today or exploring topics that interest me, etc. )
The latter seems to be working for me right now. I occasionally use prompts when I do a bit of a monthly or weekly reset, or if there is just a topic I am exploring after reading it in a book, I sometimes find them helpful.

Mindful Consumption of Media

Mindfulness is also something I am keeping in mind when it comes to what media I am consuming, and when I say consuming I mean anything from how much time I spend online via social media and YouTube, to binge watching tv, movies, or even podcasts, music, books or video games.

This might seem kind of restrictive but really it’s about being in tune with what I am consuming and how that is impacting me. Whether I am actually vibing with something or am I just watching or consuming it because I am bored. It is about being intentional with what I am consuming and prioritizing being more present in my life.

An example of this could be when I trying to have a conversation with someone not feeling the need to scroll on my phone at the same time and actually being present for the conversation or it could be something like when I am listening to music only doing so while I’m actually enjoying and not to just having it on repeat in the background because I need something to break the silence. Instead of having a huge playlist on I could instead listen to a favourite CD or Vinyl record from start to finish and re-discovering my love for music that is not via a streaming service. Or curating a small playlist on my iPod featuring some of my favourite songs, but make it short so that It has a shorter play period.

These are just a couple of examples of how I am being mindful about my consumption and prioritizing joy over over-consumption. I am like many other people who have become addicted to scrolling on their phones or binge watching a tv show longer than I should, which can sometimes result in procrastinating for way too long over jobs that need to be done or ending up feeling flat because I’m not having more positive kinds of stimulation in my day.

While I am not expecting myself to do things perfectly I just want to have more awareness about how things are impacting my mental health and prioritizing time away from the internet to allow myself some space to just be.

I’m currently reading ‘Digital Minimalism’ by Cal Newport which explores our relationship with technology and how it has taken over our lives, it also gives some insight too how we can regain our lives back by reassessing our relationship with technology. It has been an interesting read so far.

I have been trying to bring more non-fiction books and articles like this into my reading TBR recently, some of them center around topics like habits setting, slow productivity, self-improvement, digital minimalism, etc. I am reading these to help both broaden my reading but also as inspiration for what positive things I could bring more of into my life.

Slowing Down and Being More Present

Slowing down and being more present are also themes that feature in my goals this year. This includes not rushing things and taking my time to complete projects as well as allowing myself rest when my body needs it. This can also look like setting boundaries around using my phone or putting down my book or video game down for a while to notice what is going on around me instead of burying my head in a distraction.

In the past I have often been one of those people when working on something (whether that is something arty or a just a blog post or video) I’ve wanted to just get it done as quickly as possible instead of taking the time to enjoy the process. This year I definitely want to change that attitude (as much as my ADHD brain will let me) and try to slow the process down and just take my time and be in the moment. *

I don’t have to set deadlines, I have the privilege of being able to take my time but because of my disabilities I’ve always felt like I was behind in life because my life looked different. I felt like I didn’t meet the same milestones as other people in my life. I also felt the pressure from seeing other people online who were doing similar things to me (blogging, social media) and were having more “success” than I was which really didn’t help either (damn that self-comparison.) But I’m trying to go back to the beginning and remember why I started in the first place and that my life can look different from others and that’s perfectly okay.

Part of this is why I have decided to downscale my social media presence and focus on just personal private accounts (I recently changed my main public Instagram account to private after it being public since the early days of Instagram) because social media just doesn’t feel like a happy place for me anymore and I don’t know why I keep pushing myself to prioritize it, I’ve always been happier when I’ve not pushed myself to create specific posts for it and just shared when it felt right but recently, well I say recently but its been much longer than that It just is causing me more anxiety than its worth. And with recent changes to some of the main social media platforms it has made me question why I am on there anymore. I’m not quite ready to get rid of it all together so I thought that focusing on just having private accounts was the best course of action for me for now. **

*I’m trying monotasking instead of multi-tasking (not trying to do it all at the same time) this could be any task or activity from cleaning to writing to reading a book or doing something creative or even just enjoying a cup of tea without distractions.

** I currently have one public Instagram account that I set up a while ago to help promote this blog away from my main personal account. I am still deciding what I want to do with this one, whether to keep it for promoting posts and video content or to just use my YouTube channel for this. I will let you know when I decide what I am doing with it.

Financial Goals

Mindfulness is also playing a huge part in my financial goals this year, even though I have tried to curb my unessential spending over the last few years there will always be times that I lapse and spend a little too much on things I definitely don’t need. Last year it ended up being E-books. I am trying to use a different method this time.

As mentioned earlier in this post I read three of Marie Kondo’s books this year and I have felt like they have been really helpful for me in prioritizing both the things I am keeping in my space as well as my mindset toward what I want to bring back in.

I’m definitely not expecting perfection here but I am trying to approach this with a mindset that focuses on having things in my home that bring me joy, and not fearing getting rid of something that no longer serves a purpose in my life. For example, I decluttered 100 + books from my personal library because they were no longer something I felt happy to see on my shelves. Gone are the days where I felt it necessary to buy so many books that over-filled my shelves because I felt that I need to have as big a collection as possible, including all the popular books that other people were hyping up on social media. Now my priority is to only keep things that I actually want to read or that I actually love (and not fear getting rid of them if I feel like they don’t vibe with me anymore, whether I have read it or not,) and making sure something really sparks enough joy to bring it into my life (purchasing something new.)

To stay focused on not spending too much on non-essentials I am trying to focus on adding to my savings instead and I have really been enjoying seeing it grow every month. I am doing this by setting smaller savings targets rather than large ones, so, for example I might set a quarterly or 6 month targets and try my best to get there.

I’m also setting myself other challenges that focus on things like reading the books I already own. For this I have set myself an ‘Earn a Book’ and a ‘TBR Jar’ prompt challenge. I have a point system for my ‘Earn a Book’ challenge where I have different point amounts depending on what number of pages a book has and once I hit 10 points I can purchase a book if I want to.
If there are other things that I am interested in buying then I am adding them to a wishlist for later, so that it gives me time to mull it over and decide if this is actually something I want and once I have had time to think about it then I can make my decision on whether I want to purchase it or remove it from that list if it wasn’t something that I wanted after all.

I have found this is another good way to set a savings goal, that being that I have to save up for something on my wishlist even if I technically already have enough to purchase it and especially if it is expensive so that it doesn’t end up eating into my savings too much. An example of this is that I recently decided to rearrange my living room after doing that declutter of my house. I planned to sell some furniture pieces that I no longer needed and then I chose to invested in a new smart TV to finish off my living room. I saved up extra money to pay for the TV even though I already had enough to pay for it already.
(Before this I used my very large computer monitor that I also doubled as my tv, in addition to using it for my computer. I used it to also play games or watching tv shows and movies through a HDMI switch that I had game consoles and a dvd player plugged into), So I am enjoying the upgrade and now I have my dream gaming set up with all my consoles and games spread out over a 6 x 2 cube unit, each one has its own designated space. This is an attitude I want to keep in mind when it comes to bringing new things into my home.

I am trying my best to find ways to keep myself motivated to not obsessively purchase new things, but I will admit it is hard sometimes and I am just trying my best. I want to feel like the new things I am bring into my space feel like they have a purpose in my life or will bring me joy in using them not just having them.

Blog Posts and Other Content

One last section and then I promise I am done. If you got this far, then high five, good for you because this turned from just talking about a few goals to a five page letter, wow I certainly didn’t expect this post to be this long. So thank you if you have got this point and are still reading.

I just wanted to share a little bit here about how I am planning on managing this goal because honestly, I have had a rough time over the last few years figuring out what I want to do when it comes to writing or creating content. I feel like what I shared for so long (beauty and makeup) just wasn’t me anymore but I didn’t really know where to go or what I wanted to do. And I will admit that I have had times even recently where I was like ‘Do I even want to do this anymore?’ It has taken time to get the motivation back and some clear direction of where I wanted to go with it and what I wanted to share.

By, taking some much-needed time off to just be and work on myself has really helped me. I’ve been using this time for some reflection and it has given me what I needed to figure things out. I am hoping that it will continue to help me find my place in the world and my voice again.

Having disabilities and chronic health issues makes my life feel a little bit chaotic and this means that each day can look very different. It makes setting a schedule a lot harder, so I want to approach this in a way that means I have no expectations on myself. Meaning not setting too many strict time-line or due dates.

I want to take my time and work on things at a pace that suits me, this may mean that I might share a couple of things in a shorter space of time and then there may be breaks in between.
I’ve been exploring a lot of ideas and topics in my journal and I feel like that may influence what I might decide to post. Think of it as a sort of extension of my journal, if there are topic I want to explore further and perhaps share with you then I may do just that.

I feel like I want to start over and explore things and see where they go.
I have a few ideas that center around mindfulness, self-care and some of my favourite cozy hobbies, that I would really love to explore and share with you. So if you are happy to continue and follow me through this new chapter then subscribe if you haven’t already to keep up with any new things I have to share. I have now set things so that you can get my full post straight into your inbox but you still have the option to read it on my website if you would prefer.

One last note: I have previously talked about monetization and starting an etsy shop to sell printables on but this isn’t in my current goals. That was me thinking that it was something I should do but that is not a goal I will be following in the near future. I want to keep my hobbies as something that brings me happiness, not something that puts extra pressure on of having to make money from it. So you won’t see any obtrusive advertising here either because I want you to have the best reading experience as possible without having them break up that experience after every paragraph.

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Thank you for reading this post and getting to the end, I really hope to continue sharing more blog posts and videos in the future. See you in the next one.

Erin.

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Disclaimer – This post is not sponsored and doesn’t contain any affiliate links, any links included are for reference only in case you are interested in checking out a mentioned link or purchasing a reviewed product. check out my full Disclaimers here including Ai use on my blog. Ai was used to assist in creating the title and excerpt for this blog post only, none was used in the writing of the actual blog post itself.

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